On Bended Knees

In my previous blog post, I described a very personal experience while photographing cypress knees that could be called spiritual or transcendent.  At the outset, I will admit, I do not have the answers, but I feel the same needs that others—believers or unbelievers—have felt.  I ache just like you.  Some accuse atheists and agnostics of being hard-hearted and unfeeling on what others call the spiritual.  It’s not true.  We feel it too, but perhaps we humbly accept that the answer is not yet in focus.
   

(click on the images to see any of them larger)

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

The diversity of human individual experience leads to a diversity of belief.  I find in the cypress knees vast iconic representations of the spectrum of belief.  I wrote before that the uniqueness of these is like the uniqueness of experience each of us has that lead us to where we stand today.  No knee is truly the same, but they are all of the same genus, and in groups they sprout from a common tree. Each knee representing distinct experiences of the one--some growing large, some remaining small.

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

One common element humans have is a yearning for an answer to a question we haven’t yet completely formalized.  I really wish I knew the answer, if there is even an answer.  But what am I questioning?  It seems we all ask, generally—is there meaning in our chaotic and seemingly random life?

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

I've studied the various forms of answers.  I found so many and really no answers.  At times I feel beaten by life; at others I find awareness raised as I look across the various forms and shadows we sculpt into meaning.

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

Some find meaning in family.  I dedicated my former life to this view.  These build up a philosophy about a blessed mother and perfect child who became the deliverer of meaning through expiation, binding the family together.  It drives at the most essential connection every person has—the desire for comfort and familiarity in the embrace of loved ones.  However, for some, family hurts when human weakness injures their bonds.  They look for self-reliance and abandon the pain.

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

Some find meaning in pondering.  In my post-Mormon exploration I have pursued a solitary search.  Seclusion allows an inner-focused practice of contemplating the meaning of self, and sometimes finding the eradication of ego.  Meditation has even found support in factual neuroscience, but by digging deeply into the psyche, it vanishes and meaning evaporates along with it.  For some it is a truth they accept humbly; for many the yearning remains unsatisfied.

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

Some find meaning in pleasure.  Each of us has punctuated moments of self-indulgence.  If there is no meaning, then the import is gratification.   Life is short enough to waste, they say, and squander time on meaningless pursuits of elusive meaning.  Hedonism promises instant rewards, and ancient religions and fertility gods such as Min have been devoted to its pursuit.

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

Some find meaning in life after life after life.  The impoverished find themselves unable to devote time to philosophical searches or hedonistic paths.  This life has starved them of rewards and peace.  Facts are useless to the hungry.  They hold to the promise of life after life, where we live many different versions to gain a broader and more complete perspective.  

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

Some find meaning in facts and science—the field in which I work.  My art is based on my own scientific pursuits in technology to sense unseen light. I have patents in detection of unseen light.  Science delivers, as seen in the exponential burst of technology that even promises to save us from universal hunger, from pain to deliver prime fulfillment, and perhaps even reward future generations with immortality. Facts, however, yield no meaning to the yearning about deeper purpose. 

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

And even some find peace in ignoring all meaning, and relaxing like my cat along the lazy river a quiet life provides.  He doesn't need meaning; just a good scratch behind his ears.  Carefree, whimsical,  happy, unburdened and able to just ignore the yearn that irritates the rest.  These happy-go-lucky souls supply an embrace of solace on our journey to wherever this quest takes us.

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

Not one school of study, not a single philosophy, nor a particular creed actually has the full gamut of satisfying promises, fact and peace.  Some have peace, but lack extraordinary promises of treasure beyond the earthly.  Some have fact and study, but lack the peaceful answer to the hunger of meaning. Some have promise of splendor hereafter, but lack facts to support their claim.  Many interesting narratives exist.  Diversity of individuals find different narratives satisfying.

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

I ache for answers like you.  Why must some claim they have the answer, when they lack some component of the full triangle of human yearning?  Even my preferential bias toward science has left me incomplete.  While I don’t subscribe to any religion, I still feel that science has its biases based on the foundation of incomplete, evolved human sensory organs.  We may have expanded our detection well beyond biology through instrumentation, but we have not come close to the boundary on defining reality.  Our ego tunnel—that narrow cone of what we perceive is real—is still primitive. 

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

Religions have just as much bias and narrow-minded ego tunnels, when they claim to have a connection to "otherly plains" and "ethereal beings", but their predictions and factual answers are shown time and time again at odds with well-established measurements.  While they have imagination, they lack grounded facts.  Despite this, they call “hard-hearted” those of us who unpretentiously hold to the limited facts we do have.

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

None of us has the answers.  All of us yearn with questions.  Most of us are a combination of all the above approaches.  The terrain tread by humanity is vast.  Each of us needs respect for the sole-wandering, awe-inspiring thirst of others.  My journey of capturing unseen light represents to me the search for unanswered questions.   In promoting this blog, and moving toward an art show (which I call, "On Bended Knees") centered on these topics, I continue building the examples of surreal lit cypress knees that exemplify diversity of thought, uniqueness of individual experience and iconic human narration.  

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)

There are times in one's life when we are enormously connected with the world, the universe or whatever higher power to which you ascribe, that the simplest thing reveals enormous detail.  You find the weave of a sweater or the glistening light from a plastic water bottle just amazing.  Something as simple and humble as a muddy root can teach us much about beauty, love and tolerance.  We can touch the hand that reaches for us from deep within ourselves, even if just in form of Plato's shadow.

-- my own hand's shadow across the "cypress hand" --

(All photos are copyrighted 2015 by David Twede.  Permission must be granted for any use.)