Monday, June 30, 2014

New and Everlasting Curiosity

In LDS theology they preach the new and everlasting covenant through eternal monogamy that leads to omniscience and omnipotence.  How boring.

Almost a week ago, the LDS Church removed Kate Kelly’s covenants by excommunicating her in absentia. What a chicken shit move.  Instead of holding the hearing where and when she could attend, they did it behind closed doors and without her present.  Sure, she could have sprung $798 in airfare to attend.  Sure they could have postponed until she returned or moved it to where she was currently living.  They didn’t want to actually allow her to defend herself because the conclusion of excommunication was a necessary foregone conclusion.  The LDS Corporation can’t allow dissent to run rampant, and Kate is an example to “Morwomans” not to challenge the patriarchy of whom they solemnly covenanted in the temple to not speak evil.   Kate, I will tell you in a minute how you’re better off. Letting the LDS Sanhedrin move behind darkened doors in surreptitious manner is just the kind of history we needed to keep pointing at, so Kudos to you. 

Kate Kelly has called out the sexism in the LDS Corporation like no one has since Sonia Johnson.  The very fact that only a male can head the actual financial corporate empire topping $60 Billion in assets and liquid cash flow is financial and corporate sexism of class action suit status.  What I mean is, the Sole Corporate owner (Currently Tom Monson) of the Corporation of the President (and of the Presiding Bishprick) of the COJCOLDS (the equivalent of two Fortune 500 empires or a single Fortune 100) can ONLY BE A MALE because of the patriarchy of the men-only club of priesthood authority.  The best a woman can hope for in the financial empire is to possibly head up branch companies like Deseret Book.  A woman will not, under current policy and doctrine, ever reach CEO of the Sole Corporation.  This is complete and bold-face financial and corporate sexism that is illegal under any other US company of equivalent size.  

Another area of sexism in the LDS Corporation is how they treat the gays.  A gay or a lesbian can never experience with full acceptance of membership the same benefits of a heterosexual member in the church.  Why?  Do they engage in a different kind of sex?  Not really.  LDS heterosexual couples can (only recently without reprisal or temple-worthiness questions) engage in oral and anal sexual activities.  Do gays and lesbians love each other less?  Hardly.  Do they love their neighbors less?  Not even (my gay neighbors are the best on the block).  They can’t have children together?  Sure they can—adoption, in-vitro fertilization and more, which are all acceptable in LDS Social Services. Do they make worse parents?  Not according to the latest, accepted research.  So what is the difference?   The difference is gender.  Both members of a gay couple are the same gender.  That’s the difference.  The LDS Church discriminates against them because of gender. It's sexism of another kind.

Now to John Dehlin. They’re pulling a shit move on you buddy.  They are killing you softly.  They know to pull a bold move against you is to invite more fame and fortune for you. They want you and the public to believe that your folly is about your hype in favor of gay marriage. This is yet another tie between John and Kate—The LDS Corporation is disciplining them both over gender issues.  And while I applaud both, John’s stance is being used under false pretense by the LDS Corporation.  Fears that Dehlin’s stance on gay marriage will lead more members out of the church is not really the impetus behind their disciplinary action.  His Mormonstories elucidating the actual experience of many many members learning the actual history, revealing second anointings, showing how top CES educators cannot answer basic questions of thinking members…all of this is far more damaging to the LDS church members than John’s brave stance with same-sex couples.    The LDS corporate leaders do not want anyone realizing this.  They will work with you, John, and let your membership die a slow unacknowledged death.  That’s their best move.  And I hope you, John, don’t fall for it.  I was a nobody, and decided to take the personal empowerment path of resigning publicly and boldly at the exmormon foundation.  I hope that John is invited someday to speak at such a conference on the merits of his scrupulosity and great work in helping so many of us make a smoother transition across the PTSD incurred by leaving a cult.

When the LDS Corp removes your new and everlasting covenant, or if you resign it yourself, you will find that there is something much much better:  New and Everlasting Curiosity.

To know everything, have all power, glory and what not is boring.  The golden moments are the discovery moments and the pursuit of satiating our curiosity.  Take that away and most of us are in boring hell.  Heaven, according to the LDS, is a hell where you watch from your eternal throne while your children live the golden curiosity moments.  But you know, according to their teaching, all that will befall your spirit offspring.  This excoriating performance whose conclusion you know intimately is infinitely long and as boring as sitting through most Sacrament meetings.  That’s Mormon heaven. Or Hell.

You know that moment when you learn something profound for the first time?  Reading a well written blog or novel that fires off all kinds of new thoughts?  When you get a new app for your phone or tablet?  The Newness of the Everlasting Curiosity is exciting.  Love your wristwatch but want the excitement of a new one? You get a new band.  Love your pendant, but love to show off new style? Get a new chain.  Tired of your boring friends at church?  Find new ones.  Seeing the limitation of your inherited, family philosophy?  Search for a new one.

Leaving the LDS cult is like becoming a child who is merging into adulthood again.  All the fascination of a whole world opens to your exploration, of choosing new directions, of seeking new friends, learning new insights—it’s the candy store that continues to give when you remove the abundant limits placed on you by Mormondom.

John, Kate, celebrate your new lives.  Kate—yours was pushed on you.  John, take a bold step and go into the world on your own terms.  The respect you will earn outside is something you can never get inside the LDS church now.  They will never trust you with non-disclosure agreements and “eternal” corporate secrets to make you a general authority.  Why would you stay there when you can grow your rock-star status outside.  The flux of members is away from the church.  You should be there holding open the door now.

We greet both of you happily among our ex-mormon ranks.  We expect great things from you both, as you explore the candy with us.  There’s more than enough sweets for everyone.

If you enjoyed this blog, see this one from 2015 for a new take on everlasting curiosity.   

A model who shortly after posing, took her life due to depression, and yet, she was full of beauty and life, but besoddened by so many cultural expectations on her.  How deeply troubling.


  1. Absolutely beautiful. The prose and the photography. Thanks for making my day. Thanks for supporting Kate and John.

    Morning Glory

  2. It IS that way isn't it?! New & exciting and MUY MUY interesante!!! Even the LDS church is much more interesting (yet disappointing) on the outside.